​Marianne Rice​
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Life is a Balancing Act. Sometimes You Nail It, Sometimes You Drop the Ball #balance #writinglife

5/19/2019

1 Comment

 
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My word for 2019 was--scratch that--IS Balance. I'm a great multi-tasker. I mean, you have to be when you work full-time, have three active teenagers, and also have a writing career. Toss in a husband and, well, I would call him another task. (Kidding, honey. Love you lots!)

I try to do everything I can to be involved in my job/school (I'm a teacher), my writing community, and especially my children's lives. Not like Helicopter Mom mode, I'm SO not one of those. But I want my children to know I care about them and am there to support them in everything they do. If they want me to chaperone events, I do. If they want me to take an active role as a team mom, I do. If they want me to back off, I do.

When Princess started high school four years ago she asked me to stop chaperoning dances. So I did. When Sports Girl started high school last year she wanted me to be around, so I was. I am. Little Guy doesn't care one way or the other but I pretend he really, really, wants me around. And wants to still snuggle, even though he says he doesn't.  

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So, there's work, there's kids. And then there's me. I do a lot for others and I'd been interpreting my writing life as doing something for "me". Yes, writing is my outlet. It's what I enjoy doing. But since being published four years ago, it's no longer a hobby but also a potential career. To turn it into a full-time career,, I needed to make more time to write. But then I also realized I wasn't doing anything to take care of me. 

That's when my fitness journey started. I've always been active and I cook a lot of healthy meals, but this aging thing is catching up with me. In March, I started focusing more on my physical health. I started my Balanced Babes workout group (come join us!).  However, with that, ironically, came a cost. In order to squeeze in daily workouts, I lost valuable writing time. But if I write, I'm stationary and not getting my workout done. I have such little time to myself--like thirty minutes between work and my son's games, if I'm lucky. Sometimes it's straight from work to the field if the game is far away. And Sports Girl's games are at night so we're missing family mealtime and getting home late. 

When there aren't games scheduled (which seems to be only one day a week), I'm using that time to workout and not write, hence my lack of blogs since the end of February. This weekend I attended the Maine Romance Writers Retreat. It's always so much fun to get together with fellow authors, but during the writing workshops I realized how much I missed writing. I don't feel complete without working it all in.

So how do I do it? I'm a scheduler. I'm a planner. I'm organized. I'm awesome at multi-tasking. But I'm going to have to own that I can't do absolutely everything. And that's okay. My next task is to figure out how to manage working 45+ hours a week, getting to my kids' games (and picking them up from practice), exercising, and writing. 

It's a challenge I'm ready for. It'll also mean I need to say no to some of the other responsibilities I've tacked on over the years. I don't say 'Yes' because I feel guilty about saying 'No', I say 'Yes' because I truly enjoy doing all the extras. But now it's time to lessen those "extras" and say 'Yes' to more ME stuff. 
Who else is in the same boat? I know I'm not alone. There's so much pressure to do it all these days but we really need to stop and reflect on what's important to us. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. What are you going to take off your plate so you can focus on more of?
1 Comment
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